Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Well, it’s two in the morning and I forgot to write this week’s Let’s Talk column. So what can I say? I’m a failure, a worthless cad, a meshugana…I’m not Jewish so I might have spelled that wrong. Anyway, I blew it. So I’m writing all of this to say I screwed up. No longer am I the stalwart rock that once donned toga and tassel, carving my literary way through the jungle of word and wit, syntax and sonnet, salient syllable soaring stealthily straight in salubrious song, sung in silent sentence…so. Take that!
Actually, I was thinking of putting up one of my poems, but I decided to just ramble on with a dumpster equivalent of thrift store trash. Hey, some of the stuff out of the trash bins behind a thrift store is good stuff. I once outfitted my whole apartment with state of the art furniture. It was all from nineteen sixty three, but in its day, olive green vinyl was hot.
Okay, so I won’t drag this out too long, I’m sure it’s boring, but let me leave you with this…when a man sees his life through the eyes of the feathered eagle, the wings of time beat a rhythm to his soul. Remember that. In fact, memorize it…it serves no purpose, but if you knit your eyebrows just right and stare off at nothing, it’ll sound profound and enigmatic and you’ll have people, especially liberals, thinking you’re smart. And if they’re with Green Peace they might even cry.
Alright, enough rambling. I promise next week’s column will be much better. I may even do it on sex. Probably not…don’t remember much about it. Just forget this column ever existed. At least it’s short. Gimme’ a break, I’ve had a lot on my mind lately. It’s almost Christmas, let’s see some of that forgiving spirit, huh?
Until next time…
Keck
