It’s Thanksgiving
 
 
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Yes, it's Thanksgiving, and we have so much to be thankful for. I'm thankful for a lot of things. I'm thankful that Ted Dansen, Barbara Streisand, and Robert Redford moved to Canada liker they promised. I'm thankful that George W. Bush can no longer sign spending bills. I'm thankful that John McCain has saved the Republican party and that he and senator Feingold got the money out of politics. I'm thankful that I don't have to see or listen to Rosie O'donnel, Howard Stern, or Madonna nearly as much anymore. I'm thankful that Btittany Spears has taken to wearing underwear. I'm thankful that David Letterman is disappearing. I'm thankful that I didn't have my gun with me while I was watching Sex and the City. I'm thankful that David E. Kelly is going the way of Lenny Bruce. I'm thankful that the poor and unfortunate insurance, car, and lending company CEO's are getting a bail-out from our government so that all of us who have to pay our own bills can rest easy at night, knowing that our generous and loving politicians on Capitol Hill are watching out for us. I'm thankful that Bill Maher is going to burn in hell for eternity...just kidding. I'm thankful that Oklahoma doesn't give a rat's ass what the rest of the country thinks, especially California and New York. I'm thankful for my baby whale skin jacket that I got from a mail order house in Thailand...just kidding again. I'm thankful for the singing voices of Elvis Presley, Ray Charles, Michael Buble, Joanie Summers, Doris Day, Keely Smith, Sam Cook, Brook Benton, James Taylor, James Dewer, Frank Sinatra, and Queen. I'm also thankful that a group of very brave Christians decided to leave England and brave the rough waters of the Atlantic ocean and start a colony on the eastern shores of this wonderful land, giving me the freedom and liberty to love whomever I want, to hate whomever I want, and to kill whomever I want...REALLY just kidding! But most of all, I'm thankful that a Holy and loving God had the grace and mercy to send his only Son to give his life for mine so that I won't have to suffer in everlasting torment...like Bill Maher. No, come on, I really am just kidding. Who does Bill Maher give thanks to? Given his misplaced yet voluminously overblown ego, probably Bill Maher. My Thanksgiving wish is that Mr. Maher would be knocked in the head by God and turned to salvation so that my joking above regarding his eternal soul doesn't prove to be prophetic. God could choose to save him, he really could. I hope He does. If not, I'd settle for just giving him a good swift kick in the balls. Keck
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